Grammar is cool!
"What?!" You might say, But I will absolutely argue that grammar is cool. Some aspects of it at least.
"Why?" You ask?
We can change a whole tone and perception by just using different grammar!
Let me show you.
Sit down!
Who is this person to come and just order me around?
In English, there are several tense and tense forms. The most basic and the first you learn is probably present simple. Basically the most simple form of a verb. Work, Eat, Sleep, Stop, Sit
We use it to show that something is in a schedule, that we are always doing something, that we have a routine. What we also use this one for is to give someone an order. Eat your vegetable! Go to sleep! Stop doing what you are doing! Sit down! This is our parents bossing us around. Usually, unless you are in the military, we do not like to be bosses around. Humans like to feel that we have a choice and can use our free will to create our reality. No one likes the bossing parent once you are over 12. Imagine now, how we talk to our colleagues, clients, customers. How often do we not use this exact tense form?
Don't do that now, we have to do this.
Stop with what you are doing I need to talk. Print these documents for me. Can you create this for me now?
Can you see that these examples are like giving orders? The receiver of the message will most probably feel this way. Ordered to do something.
How do you feel when you are being given orders? When Your mother comes and tells you how to fold the laundry correct?
Usually not very good. We get defensive and irritated. Who is this person to come and just order me around?
Don't worry, I have a really easy solution for you!
IF an easy way to sound polite.
In usage of real or unreal, past or present actions and reactions. Something like this we are taught about conditionals. I want to introduce this one as a way to sound polite. Will it be slightly longer sentence we have to produce? Yes we do. Sometimes we have to do something a little bit extra to get a better result. This is true with everything though.
Don't do that now, we have to do this instead=
If I were you, focus on the other task, as that is the focus now.
Stop with what you are doing I need to talk. If you could please give me few minutes, I would need to talk with you for few. Print these documents for me. If I could please ask you to bring me the document. Can you create this for me now? If you could create this now, it would be great.
Dangers with using it
NONE! Well not completely right.
If we Overuse the ifs and the court should would it can sound as we are trying to hind something. So adding too many of them are not advisable.
Not use the polite request in a time and place where it should be used so we create a feeling of non urgency
This is easily fixed though.
If you feel that you English is not good enough, find a teacher and work together to improve your English in general.
Find a communication consultant that can help you with communication only, in case you feel your overall English is good.
Check out Toutube videos on how to communicate and English small grammar points like this.
Introspection, imagine how you would like to be addressed and talked to. What do you find OK and not OK. How close are you to actually communicate in the way you like it. Make changes accordingly
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